Transformative Power of Books: Illuminating the Path of Personal Growth

The rain is gently drizzling today, and my office basement is always dim and sombre throughout the year, but today it feels particularly dreary and damp.

When I have some free time, I often yearn for the invigorating sunlight.

Certain senior colleagues have worked in this office for five to ten years longer than me. Could their dark and gloomy presence be the reason for this place?

No patients are coming to the hospital today, and the phone that used to constantly ring remains silent. Is it due to the weather, or is it because of my inadequate marketing skills? I'm not certain.

I have recently started writing.

Since 2019, I have been dedicating over an hour daily to reading books. There are so many books I wish to explore. There are truly exceptional books and numerous ones I eagerly want to recommend to close friends.

My writing journey began when a friend asked me about a specific book, and I couldn't summarize it all at once. My thoughts didn't align coherently, and I couldn't effectively convey them. That moment sparked my desire to organize and preserve my thoughts through writing. This method was also discovered in the books I read.

Expressing my intended thoughts through writing is not just about jotting them down or keeping them to myself. It can also be connected to blogging as a side job; it could serve as great motivation to continue, so there's no reason not to do it. Since I haven't written for a long time, posting something daily is challenging.

I wrote a diary daily since I started forming memories until I was about 13. It was because I eagerly anticipated receiving ABC chocolate (the first chocolate product in Korea) as a wise reward from my teacher every morning. I filled thin notebooks with dates and weather and filled them with short writings about my daily life and emotions. Back then, writing was a part of my life, just like brushing my teeth, and it never felt difficult; moreover, I had ABC chocolate waiting for me.

These days, it's different when I begin to write. I excessively warm up my brain.

Perhaps it was because of my ambition to read too many books at once that I only remember a few after reading them. I didn't give much thought to the limitations of human memory, and I believed that if I only remembered what was worth remembering and continued reading, it would eventually accumulate and grow. I want to anchor that flow through writing to remember things for a long time.

The period when I started reading books every day was during a time of heartbreak.

An empty heart, anxiety about the future, thoughts of suicide, depression to the point where everyday life became hard, tears that flowed incessantly... I couldn't solve them on my own.

It wasn't a problem that my family or acquaintances could solve. On the contrary, their intervention only made it more difficult.

When I hit rock bottom, I came across a YouTube channel and started reading books by Pomnyun Sunim.

I discovered that many people were going through similar situations to the ones I experienced. Pomnyun Sunim's touching words made me realize that what I went through was just a small part of life and that suffering is a controllable problem often stemming from human foolishness. His words resonated with me, urging me to stop tormenting myself and awaken, and I gradually stepped back from the edge. I intentionally clung to and nurtured these problems for a long time. I deeply regret the negativity that consumed that period of my life.

Reading books during my recovery has strengthened my mind and helped me think rationally.

The more I read books, the clearer it becomes how misguided my past self was.

Books may not hold all the answers, but they certainly guide me towards personal growth.

Whenever negative emotions arise, books become like mental bodyguards for me.

I will hold onto books until my eyes grow weary and I can no longer see.

I want to continue growing through reading books whenever joy and sorrow intermingle in my remaining life.